I just finished a post on our other daily site, www.multiplemyelomablog.com, about the stress many cancer patients face “Watching, waiting, and hoping—and praying—for just a bit more time. A few more months or years.” If you are feeling reflective—and don’t mind reading a bit of a downer—you may want to check it out.

But this brief post isn’t about that—not really. I wanted to share something my wife said to me on the ride. As you know, Pattie is also a cancer survivor. As the miles slid by, I shared with her some of the e-mail topics I had been reading from other myeloma patients recently. One in particular intrigued me. This patient wrote about how she didn’t feel it was fair for multiple myeloma be referred to as a “beast.” This patient had come to terms with her cancer—and felt it had opened her eyes to the blessings she experienced around her. My usually quiet, non-opinionated wife stopped me right there! “I hate that!” she vehemently exclaimed. Cancer has no redeeming character. Cancer sucks! Being a cancer patient sucks—and it makes cancer patients who are having a hard time or aren’t doing well feel bad about themselves for feeling that way.”

Setting aside the fact that I am one of those positive—make the best of your situation and stay positive—cancer patient types she was referencing, I do understand how she feels. It’s OK for me to feel that way—it’s my cancer. But it is also an incurable cancer which may inevitably take me away from her someday. And she’s right! Cancer does suck! We may come to accept it. It may help make us stronger—or grow closer to friends or the ones we love—but it still sucks! For us and those closest to us—and it’s alright to feel that way!

Feel good (or not—that’s OK!) and keep smiling! Pat

2 thoughts on “Reflections From A Long Ride To Orlando: Cancer Sucks!

  1. Hey Pat,
    I think we try to put positive spins on cruddy circumstances to
    save our sanity and avoid falling into the black hole of depression. I know I do. I don't go so far as to call it a gift(not even close), just counting what blessings we do have because if I really start to think too much about the reality of this situation where a man with an 8 year old gets diagnosed with an "incurable" cancer(I put that in quotes because I think allos can be curative) I can get downright ticked off. Though I know there are people who are worse off and would trade places with us, I know all too well there are a whole lot more who would think our situation is a complete nightmare. And it is. Cancer sucks!
    Yes there are a few things that suck more….but not many.
    Smiling through it whenever possible, Denise

  2. Thanks for your comment, Denise! I agree with you–whatever works! Spin can be a good thing if it helps us keep going and staying positive. Good luck to Tim! Pat

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